Give us strength

Being a mom is tough. Being a mom of kids that lost their dad, just plain sucks sometimes. I don't have all the answers. I wish i did. I wish I knew what to tell Nolan when he asks, "Why can't God let daddy come back? Why did he have to take MY daddy?" Tonight was full of tears. For both of us. He had stayed the night at his uncle's house whom he adores. Unfortunately he hadn't seen him in months. I knew it was going to be hard to come home. He wants a man in his life full time, not part-time. I just don't have the right answers for him. All I know to do is hold him and tell him it will be ok. He's crying as he says, "mama, when am I gonna have a daddy again?" I don't want to have a pity party and say why me but why THEM? How is this fair? I understand that God will bring someone into my life someday but in the process sometimes I don't know what to say. So I said, "Let's just pray right now." So we did. I prayed God would bring him comfort, that he would wrap his arms around him and show him how much love he has for him and that it would be ok. Bring him peace Lord, please. We prayed for a few minutes and we started talking a bit. Then Nolan said, "mama, can you pray again please?" I just want to squish him sometimes. He's got such a good, sweet heart. I hope God gives that sweet heart of his some comfort through the tears.